Saturday, April 1
Learn the subtle skill of learning how to avoid eye contact - especially useful for times when your boss is trying to assign tasks, that weird neighbor lady tries to catch your attention, or the overly enthusiastic mom at the playground is talking to you. Learn how to avoid eye contact without seeming rude and how to fade into the background of any situation. This class will be followed by a Level Two Avoidance.
Saturday, April 1
Learn how to get your enemies under your thumb in this master class on Thumb War strategy. You will learn the best way to fake out your enemy, thumb strengthening exercises, and how to dominate in any Thumb War you may stumble upon.
Saturday, April 1
Put on your very best cardigan and join us for a cardigan fashion show featuring the latest trends in sweater wear. Cardigans with buttons are strongly encouraged, and the fashion show will be followed by a discussion of trending library fashions. Library Chic is the newest fashion craze and all are welcome to learn more about this important fad.
Saturday, April 1
Is pickleball too loud for you, with all the popping and thwacking? Try the newest version of this breakout sport, where paddles and rackets are replaced with large pickles or other pickled vegetables. Enjoy a relaxing, ergonomic sport that makes a pleasant splatting noise with every hit. PLEASE NOTE: Handwashing stations will not be available during this event. Vegetables larger than zucchini are prohibited.
Saturday, April 1
Within every pet rock is a spirit just aching to come out. Participants will use markers, glitter, mystic incantations, and glue to bring new energy to their pet rock, specifically sentience. Optional sections of this program include teaching your pet rock the difference between right and wrong, teaching your pet rock proper diction, and pipe cleaner art.
Saturday, April 1
Join us from 9 to 9:02 AM to relieve stress by verbally demeaning the books that have brought you discomfort or unhappiness in your life. Popular titles include Twilight, Catcher in the Rye, Amelia Bedelia, and 1984.
Staff Picks
Trinity
Cleetus
War and Peace
Elaine Benes
Pride and Prejudice
Mark Twain
Gravity’s Rainbow
